Forms, feelings, forms

I am posting about a sequence of events that happened for Table 7 in UE2 on Thursday in the late morning. Tim, Alia, Sherry, and Gayle were at Table 7.  The episode is striking to me because it contains several distinct chapters of inter-relating, including conflict, resolution, and return to normal work. The video is too long to post here (33:16) but will be on the server. (UE2 120628 forms.and.feelings T7.mov)

• Phase 1: Debating about elastic energy, whether we need to visualize the molecules in our model, and whether we really know what others in the group say we know. Alia and Sherry having conflict building up during this time. Various instances of stepping on each other's contributions and hurting feelings both ways, though I couldn't tell at the time.

1/2 Boundary event: Sherry gets up and leaves. (16:19)

• Phase 2: Alia wants to tell how she feels about Sherry (starts to say "You know, I find it..." at 16:32), but Tim and Gayle don't know this yet. They are still discussing energy, and Alia politely listens to them and waits for good moment to break the flow and tell them about how she feels about Sherry.

2/3A Boundary event: A long enough break comes in the conversation that allows Alia to break in. (17:40, beginning again with "You know, I find it interesting...")

• Phase 3A: Alia tells Tim and Gayle about how she feels about Sherry. Alia can't say or do anything right. Sherry was displeased with Alia whether she participated or not. Alia was trying but Sherry was huffing and puffing and rolling her eyes. Alia is frustrated.

3A/3B Boundary events: Gayle says "So what did you think about chemical energy" (18:18), and Tim mutes the mic.

• Phase 3B: The group continues to discuss with the mic off.

3B/3C Boundary event: Eleanor comes (20:08)

• Phase 3C: Group continues to speak with Eleanor with the mic off.

3C/3D Boundary event: Hunter comes to unmute the mic (20:38).

• Phase 3D: Group explains to Eleanor why the mic needed to be unmuted and negotiates with Eleanor about whether to tell her what they were really talking about. 

3D/3E Boundary events: The decide that they will tell her. Hunter hears this in the mic and decides to join (21:26).

• Phase 3E: Hunter joins the group and they speak about our acceptance of the fact that they were sharing their feelings, and what those feelings were.

3E/3F Boundary events: Tim affirms Alia (24:46), there is some laughter, and Hunter leaves (24:56).

• Phase 3F: Eleanor continues to speak with the group about taking time to discuss feelings.

3F/3G Boundary event: Eleanor leaves (25:50).

• Phase 3G: Group continues to discuss feelings.

3G/4 Boundary event: Feelings discussion ends with a joke about margaritas (26:56).

• Phase 4: Resume discussion of molecules (Gayle: I can't do the molecular thing).

The record (as I cut it) ends at 33:16, when Eleanor gets the everyone's attention for a large group discussion.

I think it is interesting to just note some numbers. Phase 1 lasts an indeterminate time, probably beginning before the record. We can go back to the file before this and find out when it starts. Phase 2 lasts about 1:20 - this is how long Alia waits before getting (or choosing) to say what she wanted to say. The "feelings" discussion lasts 9:15, from when Alia introduces it to when Alia makes the joke about margaritas. I also think it is worth noting that the "feelings" discussion kept going after I left, and after Eleanor left. As if maybe they couldn't end it at that same time - they needed to end it with perhaps a more intimate group, or the group with which it began. I think it is curious the way it ends, suddenly. the joke is predictable - it seems people usually end a group conversation with a joke so that everyone knows they can "leave." In this case, nobody is literally leaving, but they leave the topic.